Dear Beloved Brother,

though it has only been a few hours.
but im already missing my brother.

i miss him coming into my room.
annoying me.
me beggin him to lend me his hp.
missing him asking me whether he can use my laptop.

the tears i shed.
symbolised the words i wanted to tell him.

to ask him to take care of himself.
that i love him so much.
and am gonna miss him like crazy.
and wanting him to have a safe journey.
have as much fun as he can.
to eat more.
to spend more time with his gf.
to wish him good luck.

the tears i shed.
symbolised the feelings i felt.

love. miss. dread. excited. sad. happy.
all in one.

the tears i shed.
was words of goodbye.

the tears i shed.
is gonna welcome him back home next saturday.

signing off,
a sister yearning for her brother to come home safely

passionata...

passion.

if passion is what you feel
why walk away?
if passion is what you greed for
why give up?
is passion is in your blood
why kill it?

responsibility.

if it is a burden
let it go.
if it is a trouble
then pass it on to someone else.
if you're not up to it
leave it.
don't trouble us.

*and it goes to show how useless, weak and undiscipline person you are.*

guts.

guts to say about other people.
without looking in the mirror.
and looking through your ownself.
instead blaming on other people.

those guts.
theyre disgusting.

pride.

i am proud :
of my titisan family.
of my dramatec famm.
of my own family.

love.

that i have for drama.
for my friends.
for my family.

nothing.

can come between my passion.
my interests.
my dreams.

missing.

farah. zie. seri. ooze.
ama. faz. jannah. idah.
wani. adeen.

signing of,
drama queen.

unforgiven.

it was a very good show.
though there were loopholes.
but overall it was a worth-the-money performance.

congartulations first and foremost to the director of the pasir ris sec unforgiven.

siti fairuz bte md. fawzy.

the amount of stress, pain and trouble she had to go through to achieve what was portrayed yesterday was a pain for me to watch.
but the amount of joy on her face yesterday made me feel her happiness.

kak, i am so proud of you. i am glad to there.
to witness your production.
to witness the start of your journey as a professional director.
to witness your joy.
your happiness.

and once again i am proud.
that you are my sister.

to khaldun.

you have done an awesome job in organizing everything.
and yes i wont deny this.
i look up on you.
you are one of my idols.

when it was over and when you turned back and hugged your buddies.
i could see that the burden is lifted from your shoulders.
i am very proud of this friend of mine
khaldun.

darling anas.

i have always loved his voice.
always loved his personality.
always loved everything about him.
you did an extremely hilarious job with the mufti.
and the singer it was a
"blew-me-away" kinda performance.

your voice. i like.

hydil bacin.

though you were not involved in the acting scene.
your dikir barat performance was just energetic.
i like him when he performs for dikir.
cause the energy he gyrates can be felt by everyone.
i like his energy.

and i like your adik sedara. cute giler. aku chop dier dulu kae.
kalau dier dah besar suruh dier cari aku.

to my friends who came down with me to witness the spectacular performance.
who willingly paid for the tickets.
i am so glad that you guys came down.
and it was such a good day as i met up with my gurlfrens whom i missed so much.
farah zie seri.

ama and razak.
my love.
thank you for hanging out together with us.
i love u muchos.

to mat rape if he ever comes across this blog.
you're funny.
i loike.
great company.
see ya arnd.

abg an.
bacin.
blum mandi. lambat. tak bayar.
ahhahahha.
lurb ya many2!

and to the rest of pasir ris sec casts and crew.
i want to shout out a biggg THANK YOU.
cause you guys made the audience so proud of all of you.

kudos to pasir ris sec!

screams of joy.

you made me scream in the middle of the road.
you made me oblivious to the fact that im in a public place.
you made the kid in me emerge out.

dumbfounded.

thank you ijan.
thank you fie.
and thank you to sir.

you made my day...

gemilang di hari raya.

tiada kata yang dapat ku ungkapkan.
perasaan ku yang meluap-luap ini.
perasaan bangga.
bangga dengan kawan-kawan ku.
di titisan temasek.

raya gemilang sudah pun berakhir.
dan hati ini amat merindui.
kepada cast-cast gemilang.
yang amat dikasihi.

telah banyak ku pelajari daripada kamu semua.
telah banyak penglaman yang ku dapati.
telah banyak yang ku ketahui darimu.
terima kasih ku ucapkan.
kepada casts dan crew.

kepada yang turut menjayakan drama gemilang.
aku ingin berterima ksaih pada mereka.
kerna telah memberi ku peluang.
peluang yang mungkin takkan berulang.

terima kasih titisan temasek.

the belief and faith i have in you, my dearest casts...

i am at my weakest point now.

am at a stage where i feel helpless and down.

am at a stage where i feel like im alone facing all these by myself.

but i cant be oblivious towards the people who have supported me so far.

my fellow friends, sisters, brothers,

who had gave me all the love i need.
all the care i yearned.
all the smiles to make my day.

a thank you is too little compared to what you have provided me with.
a hug is too cold for the much warmth you've given me.
words are too fake compared to the sincere comfort you have given me.

please wish me all the best for the gemilang concert which is starting in a few hours time.
i really wish i could prove "those" people that we THE CURRENT MEMBERS OF TITISAN TEMASEK CAN DO TP PROUD!

good luck to us guys and may we come back home with a sense of accomplishment.

specially for samir...

you do not realise how much you love your partner
only after she's gone.

you do not realise how much she means to you
only after she slipped away from your fingers.

you do not realise how much she means to you
only after you heard something happened to her.

this post is specially dedicated to my beloved friend samir.
take care of her and dont ever let her go.

life...

sometimes in life you will not get what you want.
sometimes you have to earn it.
work for it. cry for it. reach out for it.

but what if one is tired?
tired of doing all these things?
just to earn some happiness and love?

what if she has decided to for once be silent?
let the whole world speaks and she sits and observe?
let the whole world laugh and play
while she sits at the edge of a cliff weeping?

crying at her own life as it drifts away?
laughs transforming as tears?
joy as sadness.

when things are just about to blossom
the flowers wilt and die.
so as the heart of a humble slave who yearns for her prince to save her
from herself.

timeless love.

Baby, come close, let me tell you this
In a whisper, my heart says you know it, too
Baby, we both share a secret wish
And you're feelin' my love reaching out to you

(Chorus:)
Timeless
Don't let it end, no
Now that you're right here in my arms
Where you should stay
Hold tight, baby
Timeless
Don't let it fade out of sight
Just let the moment sweep us both away
Lifting us to where
We both agree
This is timeless love

I see it all, baby, in your eyes
When you look at me, you know I feel it, too
Yes, I do
So let's sail away and meet forever, baby
Where the crystal ocean melts into the sky
We shouldn't let the moment pass
You're making me shiver; let's make it last
Why should we lose it?
Don't ever let me go

(Repeat chorus)
Timeless
Baby, it's timeless
Oh, baby, it's timeless
Hold tight, baby
Timeless
Don't let it fade out of sight
Just let the moment sweep us both away
Lifting us to where
We both agree
This is timeless
This is timeless love

the journey of love.

why do i have to feel this way?

why when everything was going very well i would come across something that made my heart ponder.

made me steer away from the journey of my starting love life.

why when i thought that things could actually work out i will come upon something that makes me think twice.

makes me withdraw.

in order to protect myself as i do not want to get hurt again like how i did before.

is this all a game?

is love a game?

is love about hiding and seeking?

or is love about chasing and running away?

what is love?

when will love be called love?

how do i know its love?

when the journey is begin with doubts.

down on my knees....

girl.

please do thnk before you do anything.

you may think that i dont know what is going on.

please. if you need to talk. im here. seriously.

girl.

dont do anything rashly.

discuss. think. feel. weigh the pros and cons.

please....

for once im begging you girl...for once....

please......

if you love us girl, dont do this.

my prince....

my handsome prince took my hand.

and kissed it.

i could only suppress a smile of gratitude.

that he had made me happy. so happy that day.

deeparaya was a blast. my first time hosting quite a big show. at tp.

was awesome. the crowd was great though i feel that i did not do that well. but i really enjoyed myself. had a real blast. worth all the stress and trainings and the late sleeping.

above are some pictures taken. have a look. take your time....

moments of us.

those eyes.

they stared into mine.

i sat there alone.

watching the world revolving around me.

then you came and sat beside me.

and smiled. and talked. and stared.

i wanted to ask you to stop.

as my heart was racing.

but i did not want our moment to end.

we sat beside each other and feeling each other's presence.

i dont want to get hurt again.

i dont wanna think that you feel whut im feeling.

i dont wanna pretend.

i dont want to be carried away by my feelings.

so all im asking you is if you want me,

ill be right here waiting.

waiting for you.

my prince.

smiling always.

you just sat and smiled.

then you took my breath away.

saying i look nice today.

you made my day.

i have nothing else to say.

except for thanking you.

cause you made my day.

the reason why im still strong.

this post is specially for my sister,

siti fairuz.

there is no word that can describe our relationship. our friendship. our allibi. our kinship. our everything.

nothing can separate me with her except death.

noone. noone had ever cried with me the way she did. noone hugged me as tight as her. noone consoled me as comforting as her. noone made me laughed as much as her. noone slapped me hard with reality as much as her.

shes God's best gift to me.

if i am allowed to change one thing in my life,

it would be to make her my real sister.

i love you forever and always.

the royal family.

Dearest God,

please help my loved ones who are going through their own plight.

a girl. who just wanted to get engaged. but there are obstacles. challenges. steering her away from her course of future. is this the way things are suppose to go? just because there are other family commitments? because of there are irresponsible human beings on this surface of the earth not wanting to take care of their own parents?

a girl. went through what i did. its painful to see her going through and taking the same step as i did before. the state of denial. the state of falling too deeply in love fer the guy and cannot bring myself out of that hole. stuck. at nowhere. at my own dreams. wishes.

and when i realised that its just a dream, it was too late. i have fallen in love with him.

But all has changed. im busy with productions cuming up. distractions. i love distractions.

girl. i wish you all the luck with him. im praying hard he is not like andre adeen. im wishing so hard you'll not end up like me a lost soul. im dreaming so hard to make sure it'll become a reality for you.

to my queen and king,
mum dad i love you and thanks for understanding my tight schedule.

to the future kings,
please do well for your exams.

to all my beautiful princesses,
ama, aziemah, farah, seri, jannah, faz, fie, wan2,hinna,charm
princess hiesha love you always.

to my handsome princes,
ferooze,irsyad
princess hiesha's missing you always.

and to those wicked guys who have broke all the girls' hearts,
go to hell bastards!